Ang tagal na...

Hindi ko alam kung ano'ng pumasok sa utak ko bakit ako ngayon nagsusulat. Naalala ko, nagagawa ko lang magblog kapag may bago akong pagkakakitaan, o kapag nanalo ako sa isang contest, o minsan kapag masaya, pero madalas...kapag nalulungkot ako. Tulad ngayon...

(Ewan ko. Hindi ko alam kung matatapos ko 'to. Kapag nabasa mo 'to, nagawa kong i-publish, at congrats sa'ting dalawa! Ikaw na lang ata ang reader ko eh. See, iniwan na ako ng mga mambabasa ko, bukod kasi sa walang kwenta mga posts ko, trying hard pa ako magsulat.)

Ang dami dami dami dami nang nangyari sa'kin na dapat ginawan ko ng blog pero hindi ko nagawa....loser talaga! At 'eto ako ngayon, pinipilit ulit ang sarili na makapag-sulat. Ang totoo, hindi ko alam kung anong isusulat ko. Blanko talaga utak ko ngayon. Kaya medyo sabog itong post na ito. Hmm, sige hindi pala medyo, sabog talaga! Ayoko naman ikwento lahat ng nangyari sa'kin. Ang dami eh. Hindi ko na rin alam kung saan ako magsisimula. At isa pa, parang nawala na sila lahat sa isip ko.

Ayun, nalulungkot kasi ako eh. Lately kasi may mga pangyayari sa buhay ko na long term ang impact at hindi ko alam kung na-handle ko ba ito nang mabuti. Naging sunud-sunod iyong mga major decision making sa buhay ko. Ang hirap pala mamili, ano? Hindi dahil importante pareho iyong choices ko, kundi dahil hindi ako sanay pumili. Ngayon, may tanong sa isip ko kung tama ang mga desisyong ginawa ko. Minsan nagpapanggap lang ako na alam ko, pero ang totoo hindi talaga.

Paano at kelan ba talaga malalaman kung tama ang desisyon na ginawa mo?





65 comments:

KEYSI @ June 7, 2010 at 5:19 PM

"Paano at kelan ba talaga malalaman kung tama ang desisyon na ginawa mo?", lagi ko yang tinatanong sa sarili ko tuwing may desisyon akong kailangang gawin kaya lalong humihirap kase somehow, I feel like there's really no way of knowing! Hay. But then, naisip ko, sa dami na ng desisyon na nagawa naten, marerealize din naten na what matters most is for us to stand up for whatever decisions we have made, and be at peace with our choices. I'm not saying those two things are easy though, because in fact they are the hardest. Basta, chowel, don't be sad for to tell you honestly, you're one of the sound-est decisionmakers I have ever met.

omeng @ June 10, 2010 at 12:32 PM

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